Better Faster

You know, though I now have grown children, I find I can still fret and lose sleep over my concern for their well-being, growth and happiness. How can it be that I have a restless night, tossing and turning about this-or-that for my children? They are grown and they love the Lord! Yet I struggle to find the faith that gives them, AGAIN, totally over to God. I thought I possessed the faith that supplies me with peace all the time, then I become concerned and lose a night's sleep. My daughter's Blog says, "His eye is on the sparrow, so I know he watches me." I love that. He is watching my sparrows!

However, to explain myself for fretting: They are my children and can be so like me. I know my errors of the past and I want to spare them from committing the same errors. I wish for them to be better than me FASTER. Better Faster?

IN my 50's God did some major pruning, cutting, and triming in me. (ok, in my 40's too) "EEEEK! I"m like that?" was my discovery. So, maybe I'm wanting them to not need the pruning. But this I know, they will get pruned just as I was and am. After all, pruning causes us to produce more abundantly, so I shouldn't pray nor wish it away, right? So, Lord, I give you my sparrows, as I am given to you also.

On another subject, I've had some thoughts on self absorption. That when one is consumed with what makes them (me)happy, we dig a pit. This pit will go deeper and deeper and lead to nowhere but despair and disappointment. I do desire, and wish my heart to follow a right desire, to care more about others in a way that is transforming. I want to be on a mission to bring others joy. I have a husband who will always put others first. He puts me to shame. He is the most Christlike person I know...and it is all done so very quietly and without any ado.

The sermon this Sunday at my daughter's church spoke about getting a revelation of the Father's love. You know: Wow! He LOVES ME that much! Then, and only then will we love ourselves, which is necessary for releasing real love to others. I wish us all to be so secure in that love. I wish it to take root and transform us! Such Joy would be ours and His.

Lord. Watch over my sparrows today and I'll be fine. And give us love.